10 Oktober 2008

Yeihhh kemaren abis chatting ama mas CORIOUS, nyang protes kalo isi blog ku cuman nganu22 aja, jadi bikin daku pengen mbahas yang rada ilmiah dikit neh.

(dohhh bentar yaaa…..diterusin dari kantor aja nanti……udeh telat!!………waaaaaaaaaa…..belon mandi!………mengapa Tuhan….Mengapaaaaaaaaaaa??……….selalu aja begini!!!!!!!! jam 7.07 am)

This headline came tumbling into my inbox: Married Women Hate Sex.

Whoa! With a headline like that, I pretty much had to read it. It turns out it’s a study that Mom Logic, a parenting Web site, did, asking 2,500 married women about their sex lives.

A sampling of results :

• 50% of women find sex either depressing, embarrassing or a hassle.
• 29% of married women say they are too tired for sex.
• 24% of married women would rather take a bubble bath than have sex.
• 26% of the women surveyed say their sex lives took a turn for the worst after they had children.

So what do I think? First, I have to acknowledge my husband reads this blog, so I’ll be a little careful about what I say. Do I hate sex? No way. Am I often so tired that it becomes less of a priority than it was before? Sure.

To me, once you have kids you are meeting others’ needs all the time, so it’s easy to forget about your own needs. That’s especially true when your children are babies and their neediness is constant.

I don’t think that means you hate sex. I think that means you’re tired and overwhelmed.

Things do get better as your kids get older, and you and your mate can make time to be alone. The fact is, many families — including mine — have more than one child, so obviously there’s some sex going on. (Remember when you were a kid and you’d think: “There’s three of us, so mom and dad had sex three times.”)

Also, according to the survey:
• 23% of the women who have sex do it because they love their husbands and want to make him happy.
• 49% of the women have sex because they want it.
• 26% of the women surveyed say their sex lives took a turn for the worst after they had children.

In a perfect world, no one would have between-the-sheets complaints. After all, when you were newlyweds, the sex was hot. And frequent. And you were certain that was never going to change. Ha!!. Enter kids and mortgages and work and stress into that equation, and suddenly without warning there are complaints galore. Many go unspoken. But what isn’t he telling you?

1. Dad Complaint: She won’t tell me what she wants in bed.
Mom Solution: Okay, we know it’s embarrassing … but he’s not a mind reader. He wants you to speak up. If you’re too mortified, tell him you had a sex dream about him where he was doing X, Y, and Z to you…and how it really turned you on. He’ll get the hint.

(or LANGSUNG AJA PEGANG TANGANNYA…….EN ARAHIN GERAKANNYA LANGSUNG……..yeihhh daripada capek telepati!)

2. Dad Complaint: She won’t talk dirty.
Mom Solution: Again, this can be super embarrassing for most. Many Moms we talked to said trash talk makes them feel plain stupid. Tip: Start by whispering. Things you would never say out loud sound so much less scary in a whisper. If you still can’t muster up the courage, pretend to be someone else (like a French maid, maybe, or a lap dancer). Still no dice? Have someone else do it for you.

(or…….sekali22 telpon suami pas lunch………nggodain lewat telpon ….kadang jauh lebih gampang kok!…….pan ga liat mukanya!……jadi pasti ga malu!)

3. Dad Complaint: She doesn’t wear lingerie anymore.
Mom Solution: Haven’t broken out the lingerie since your honeymoon? Us either. And there’s probably no way in Hell we’ll be sporting the fishnet thigh-highs anytime soon. But we did invest in some comfy but cute pajama sets that are lacy enough to turn him on without being uncomfortable or impractical enough to turn us off. And, while we were at it, we ditched the granny panties, too.

(or……..GA PAKE BAJU AJA SEKALIAN!…..simpel gampang en dijamin MURAH!!)

4. Dad Complaint: She only likes one position.
Mom Solution: We don’t know about you, but we started liking missionary better and better we noticed how much our stomach hangs down when we’re on top. But he’s not worried about that, we assure you. If you’re feeling body conscious, lower the lights and light some candles.

(or……..DARIPADA RIBET MUSTI NYIAPIN LILIN……MENDING PASTIIN DI KAMAR ADA LAMPU POJOK YG WARNA KUNING……..SUWIRRR DIJAMIN BERASA LEBIH SEKSEH DREHH………hikss secara bwat ibu hamil nyang naek 8 kilo aja berhasil kok!…..curhat mode : ON!)

5. Dad Complaint: She won’t give me oral sex.
Mom Solution: Okay, many Moms admit we don’t do this as much as we did, say, in our pre-marriage days. In fact, for some, it’s dwindled to just birthdays. Tip: Give it up once in a while–even if it’s just for a few minutes. A little attention here goes a long way.

(or……. PAS MANDI BARENG AJA! pan juga ga ngeribetin …..wong sekalian mandi!……..lagian udah pasti bersih! masak masih jijik juga?)

6. Dad Complaint: She won’t initiate.
Mom Solution: Women like to be chased. It’s in our genetic makeup. But he needs to be needed, too. Try giving him “the tap” and see what happens. Take control!

(or ……..COBA PAS LAGI DANDAN PAGI SAMBIL BERDIRI………MUNDUR SAMBIL GESEKIN BAGIAN BELAKANG KITA KE SUAMI………SAMBIL LALU AJA……GAK USAH TERLALU DIPIKIRIN BANGET! CUMAN BWAT NGGODAIN DIKIT AJA KOK!……)

7. Dad Complaint: She just doesn’t seem into it anymore.
Mom Solution: Faking it is bad. We would never suggest that. But if you’re not into it, you need to figure out why. What would turn you on that he’s not doing? Explore your own body to figure out what makes you purr, then incorporate that new knowledge in the bedroom. Sex should be fun…not just one more thing to do. Also, a small amount of faking enthusiasm can often lead to actual enthusiasm. Just sayin’.

(yeihhhh saimtaim……..PURA22 NGELENGUH DIKIT BISA BIKIN KITA SENDIRI JADI IKUTAN ‘NAEK’ KOK……..APALAGI SUAMI KITA!)

8. Dad Complaint: She’s always worried about the kids hearing us.
Mom Solution: To lessen the chances of surprise interruptions, wait until the kids are sound asleep before getting it on. Turn on the TV or some music to muffle the noise. You might even consider getting a lock on your bedroom door for added privacy.

(or……KALO KAKAK AYE SEHH……HOBINYA NGANU22 DI KAMAR MANDI………NYALAIN SHOWER KENCENG22……dijamin ga kedengeran ama anak ……..yeihhh walo daku pasti denger lahhh, kalo kebetulan pas nginep di rumah die!……..dasar PASANGAN TIDAK SENONOH!…..duh abis gini keknye bakalan ada onigiri melayang dr ujung beruk deh!………..ato kalopun ketangkep basah telanjang ama anak….juga ga masalah…..pan lagi mandi!)

So what do you think, married women and men? SUDAHKAH ANDA NUNGGING HARI INI?……SAYA NGEMUT DUA!!

Well ternyata rumits juga yaa cuman masalah nganu22 kek ginih! Tapi benernya seh semuanya mustinya bisa diomongin (whoaaaa napehh yeee…….kalo masalah ngomongin yg ga senonoh kek gini, daku jadi berasa pakar aja en berasa KUMPAK!……..padahalllllllll………..plissss dehh…..tiap hari jg masih suka berantem ga jelas!). Studi kasus sodara aye yang karena kepaksa cuman bisa ketemu 2 bulan sekali ama suaminya, jadi diniatin banget pas ketemuan kemaren bwat mecahin rekor bercinta 60 kali dalam sebulan, padahal pas puasa. (kebayang deh, gedubrakannya sebelon imsak!………SINTING!!!).

eniheee enihooo……..kesimpulannya : SEMUANYA BERAWAL DARI NIAT! (halahhh kek kultum subuhnya AA GYM!……betewehhh apa kabarnya ya, org itu sekarang?)

Moral Catatan Harianku Jumat ini (jam 4.20 am udah sabtu sehhh!) : AYOOO CEMANGATTT NYARI KEBAHAGIAAN!………

Note.

yeihhh MOHON MAAF kalo ini blog jadi masih sering ngomongin nganu22. Secara maklum, aye newbie neh masalah nganu22……..jadi lagi demen22nya ngomongin…..kek kebiasaan ngomongin mobil kalo abis dapet mobil baru……….jadi ‘BANCI NGANU22′ dreh diriku ceritanya sekarang!……..GOMEN neeee!!

lagian……..INI PENTING LHO (weitsss pembelaan diri neh!)…….pan menurut survey :

Reason for Cheating – Suppression of Sexual Desires

Boredom and silence – these are the most common reasons why a partner seeks pleasure outside the marriage. For example, just 31% of cheating wives and 25% of cheating husbands were willing to discuss their sexual desires. By the way, only 27% of female cheaters and 17% of male cheaters knew their partner’s sexual needs.

dohhh mas CORIOUS….keknye tulisanku ternyate…….masih tetep tentang nganu22 neh……hikss TAPI KAN RADA ILMIAH DIKIT tho! secara gara22 hormon ibu hamil tidak senonoh nehhh! (wihihihi NGELES mode : ON!!….enaknya jadi ibu hamil…….ada yg bisa disalahin!)